Love Letter

Dear Ornela,

So much time has passed since we last spoke, even more since we last saw one another. In all this time, thoughts of you have been with me every day and I have missed you very much. Though I have thought about so many of the moments from our past, the memories we made and the tender moments we shared together, our time apart has also given me the opportunity to reflect on other thoughts...your thoughts. I have made a determined effort to see things from your perspective, to really understand how you are feeling. I have done this because I care so much about you and I want to try to empathize with the struggles you have been going through.

When you asked me back into your life, I knew that you were in an extremely difficult place emotionally, but I never fully realized how deeply you were hurting, and I should have been more attentive to your needs. Sometimes that means lending someone an ear or giving them a shoulder to cry on, but other times it means giving the person you love the space they need when they ask for it. This is where my love for you was tested the most...and this is where I failed you Ornela. You told me in your letter in September that you were not ready for a commitment, and even though I did not understand your decision, I should have respected it. I am so sorry for how I have treated you over the past few months, for all of the unwanted letters I have sent you, for arriving uninvited in Boston to see you, and for not respecting your wishes to simply be left alone. I am sorry Ornela...and I hope that you will forgive me.

Before we were lovers, we were friends...best friends. For six months before we even shared our first kiss we talked on the phone nearly every day, getting to know each other and letting our feelings grow at their own pace. Even more than the intimate moments we shared together, I think I miss our friendship the most. I miss the late night talks we used to have together, sharing our hopes and dreams for the future and seeking comfort in each other during the difficult times too. You were always the first person I wanted to talk to whenever something important happened in my life, the first person I wanted to share my thoughts and feelings with. You told me once that I could call you anytime, no matter what the hour, and you would always be there to listen. I miss that Ornela...I miss simply hearing your voice...I miss your friendship.

I am living in Washington DC now. Last night I took a stroll around the National Mall, my hands tucked deeply into my pockets to stave off the frigid night air. I wish that you had been there with me, simply to hold my hand as we passed the evening hours together. If you should decide to visit your family in DC, I hope that you will ask to walk with me again across the National Mall. I hope you will ask to see me.    

Despite everything that has happened between us over the past year, I truly do love you Ornela. That will never change because I don't believe true love ever really dies. I will always hope that one day you will ask me back into your heart, that you will ask me to have a relationship with you that will one day lead to so much more. But that is your decision to make, and regardless of your choice, I will always respect your wishes.

I miss you Ornela. Te dua.

Love,

Bobby